Preface:
I wrote this because it has been on my heart for 2 weeks now. It has troubled my sleep, and even knocked me off of focus at work. Speaking this is hard because it can be taken the wrong way. MY goal is to talk about understanding something fundamental Ive been learning at Church. A friend Brian Malone told me "you have to make Christ your personal savior, in that it becomes a personal thing when your walk is affected, your offended personally now" Hell is very real..and if my salvation aint in tact I have no time to worry about yours. If I plan to witness while allowing my walk to be tainted because I am to weak to stand for Christ than my witness is tainted. Remember its not about them its always about HIM(Christ). So do not be offended but see that this is more than me, or you. ITs all God...
To do something that is wrong and not know it well thats not your fault kind of like a child that for the first time does something and their parents says "NO!" Now the child is aware and can no longer use the excuse I didnt know. Paul writes in Romans 1:19 "because (AL)that which is known about God is evident within them; for God made it evident to them." I cannot say I dont no lying is wrong because I know the 10 commandments and it clearly says "Thou Shalt not lie" To tell that lie simply means I did it anyway knowing it was wrong. Alot of times we do stuff knowing that it was wrong, feeling it was wrong, even almost ashamed while doing it and kept doing. I can be mad at no one else but myself for not saying or doing anything about. I am responsible for me and only me...if I have a cousin who smokes weed and then he pressures me or persuades me to smoke with him I cant get mad at him because I said yes. If weed is my problem then it is my responsibility to not put myself around folks who smoke weed plain and simple. If I am in a situation thats hard for me to get out of then I can simply ask that they not smoke around me or leave(probrably the best choice). God has given you the power to demand control of your surroundings. If porn is your problem then learning to not use the computer so much or view that material should become a discipline(train yourself). Its up to you...if you struggle with learning to say no to people than you have to learn that everytime you dont say no and allow others to get what they want it hinders you not them. They are going to be comfortable because they believe you are comfortable so naturally they will not see a problem until you raise the issue. If a person is constantly asking you for money and your tired of being their personal bank than you have to say no but remember though Love is gentle, so you dont have to be mean about it. Saying no to even a family member, best friend, spouse/significant other can truly be hard too because you Love those people. They mean the most to you and you do not want to disappoint them. However, Love works two ways...if your family that best friend, or that spouse/significant other loves you too they are never going to ask you to do things that compromise who you are. That issue is a very big issue, sometimes we will cause others to stumble because of what we want. If someone eats too much am I going to sit around them and eat excessively to tempt them to want to join in? NO!!! The thing I would do is eat healthy with and without them to encourage them to press on toward that new goal. I cant stress LOVE enough, LOVE is seeing the needs in others and meeting it. I found that alot of us pretend to be more mature than we really are, we love to play the game like we are but we really are not. A life full of experiences wont mature you if you have not taken the RIGHT lesson from them. It simply means you have a life full of things to talk about. I believe the key to our experiences both good and bad is learning. If I worked on a job where I did construction work, Im sure I learned how to be safe, hard work, being prompt, and timely. Those lessons will go with me later on in life, on the bad side if I was a theif I learned what not to do, I learned why its stupid and what it will solve that is nothing. I also learned the pain it caused someone else when I would steal from them. So now I have a level of compassion for people I never knewI could have I know make sure to watch out that Im not hurting others in all aspects of life(shame I had to learn it by stealing).The thing is taking the lesson from that, even if though I stopped stealing what have I learned? The issue of compassion is the big thing, I now know why I need to stay away from it in case I become tempted again. The lessons learned make you remember why you dont do it. (i.e. you remember a good spanking from your parents so you know not to do whatever you did to avoid that beating again). Remember, I am hurting someone else if what I want causes them to stumble even if they appear to want the same things. Remember the passive person will never speak for fear of rejection, confrontation, or just not caring. As the believer its our job to not give them a way to potentially fall, Paul writes in Romans 14:21 " (AL)It is good not to eat meat or to drink wine, or to do anything by which your brother stumbles" Now understand Paul is dealing with this metaphor of the man who chooses to eat meat and the man who chooses not to eat meat. Its a metaphor for the strong in their walk with Christ and the weak and their walk with Christ. IF you being the stronger one can help the weaker one out you cant start by respecting his wishes. i.e. You eat meat you cannot eat meat around him so that he is not tempted. To make it practical, my cousin is now trying to kick the weed habit, then I am not going to do anything to tempt him to want to smoke. After that point its his job to say no to weed. If after I have done my part he still chooses to go do it well he has made his choice. I promise you though when a person gets tired of not saying no to something long enough they will. Its important for me and for you to check your motives though, saying no is not meant to chastise the person its meant to stop them from hindering you and themselves. So if you want to stop drinking then STOP HANGING OUT WITH PEOPLE WHO DO!! Or let them know your situation, if they choose to continue to do it then you found out they are not as friendly as you thought. People say well I can stop doing what I do for you, and the response to that is.."your absolutely right I am just not going to be around that. "If I say I love you and care about weather you are family, friend, or spouse/significant other than I cannot bear the thought of doing something that will hinder you. My goal is to lift you up and bless you. Likewise if you as my family, friend, or spouse/significant other decided to do that any way it is my responsibilty to speak up and say something in my care for you. The prisons are plagued with people who didnt want to speak up. Hospital beds are filled with people who didnt want to speak, Graveyards are filled with people who didnt want to speak up. HELL!! is filled with people who didnt want to speak up. This is my personal conviction right here. I know that Im not truly caring about those who care about me when I dont speak up. Look if I love you truly I will tell you. Christ love the disciples sooo much that he would correct them in their errors, he would not stand there and let them go down in flames. I cant, i wont. If no one else cares about you my friend you should care about you. You cant be afraid these days of losing a friend, signficiant other, or these days even family. If it is a choice between Christ and them the choice is obvious. CHRIST! I cant let my people die and I said nothing and you shouldnt either. WE must be clear that our role is not to kill them with the gospel but its to show God's love in our actions, our words, and our prayers. Because in the end its not really them...its me O' Lord standing in the need of prayer.
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